Even Jesus Shops at Walmart


I’ve reached the end of the second act of my latest novel, Dystopia. It’s coming splendidly – and quite bizarrely.

Dystopia is a dystopian satire about a man who discovers he’s on a historical reality show (which is a reality show watched by people in the future) who then travels into the future and discovers that the entire country has been taken over by Walmart. The company runs the government and all commerce in the United States and they even own the likeness rights to Jesus. Here’s a taste:

     The Walmart towered high into the clouds and stretched out several football fields in length. The front of the store consisted of about a half mile of automatic doors, which hundreds of people were filing in and out of in an endless cycle of motion. The store’s trademark smiley face loomed over the entrance like the sun, only the eyes were a bit more narrow and sinister looking than I remembered.

            The coup-de-grace, standing in front of the entrance greeting customers as they entered, was Jesus Christ himself. Well, it wasn’t really Jesus. It was some guy in a giant inflatable costume that was obviously supposed to be Jesus wearing a big, goofy grin. He looked like a Major League Baseball mascot you’d find dancing on top of the dugout if there was a team called The Cleveland Saviors. He had a robe and the beard and carried a sign that read, Save Us…From High Prices!


~ by themoderntranscendentalist on May 10, 2012.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: